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Monday, August 18, 2003

miscellaneous ramblings

Music: Deep Blue Something, "Breakfast At Tiffany's" -- I had thought this was by Toad the Wet Sprocket! whoops! :)

Mood: Cheerful

We went to the valley and took LT's cans and bottles to the recycler today. He wound up with $54. This is spending money for the fair; he is going to buy two books of ride tickets and have the rest ($30) to spend on food or treats or save for Christmas shopping or who knows what. He gets all our bottles and cans in exchange for doing the work involved in smashing and sorting them; also, there are a few people who know he does this and save their recyclables for him also. About three times a year he turns them in and gets his loot. :)



Somehow we can never go to the city without taking longer than we think we will. Today we went to Smart and Final to look around (verdict: more expensive than Costco, but considering that we wouldn't use Costco enough to make up the cost of our membership, still a good deal). They have banana split boats, which I've been hunting for since January, when I wanted to have banana splits at our playoff game party (only in California... and maybe south Texas... ;-). Anyway, after Smart and Final, we went to Wal-Mart to get LT a pair of Wranglers, since not only were his only remaining pair getting too snug on him, but he also wore them while helping me paint his sister's dresser a couple of months ago. >:-[. I managed to pass the 14c crayons without adding to our collection, and I even resisted the lure of the 20c pencil/crayon boxes... which I had just bought at 67c apiece a few days ago. We went to the mall so I could get a swimming cap. I am so looking forward to going swimming this evening even though I will look like a total pinhead; hopefully I will NOT be the only person there this time. It will be nice to know that I'm not chlorinating my hair like I have been the last few times I've gone. I've got enough split ends without doing that. I need to get my ends trimmed but I hate to spend a ton of money and feel all dumpy going to a salon just to get that done. I think as a reward for myself once I've lost all the weight I want to lose, I will treat myself to a new outfit, some makeup, and a nice haircut. Maybe on the day I take C to the Nutcracker. I am thinking about getting my hair cut short, and donating the length of it (if it's in decent enough shape) to Locks of Love, once I'm thinner. I really do NOT look good with short hair and extra weight -- my face gets rounded and my head looks so small on top of my big body. I have broad shoulders to begin with and the extra weight just adds to the problem. But when my face is thinner, a short haircut really does suit it nicely, if I can find a person to do a good enough job on it.



Speaking of weight, I'm still down 11 pounds, and I've been a good girl today. AND I found myself having to hike up my shorts a lot today. Suffice it to say, that has never been a problem in the past. They aren't terribly loose as I sit here but when I stand up and practice good posture they droop a little.



OK, I just got a huge major craving for chocolate chip cookies. What am I supposed to DO about this kind of thing? I do not want to be one of those people who always goes around saying, "oh, no, that's too many calories," and yet, I also do not want to be one of those people who keep creeping on more and more weight until they have to be hauled out of their chairs by strong relatives anytime they've sat down. So far my plan is to reward myself once a week, if I've had a losing week, by allowing myself one small (200 calories or less) indulgence. But am I never to have a banana split or an Its-It bar again? (I suppose I could exchange an Its-It for dinner occasionally, but one banana split would fill my entire day's calorie ration and then some, most likely...). I do not want to condemn myself to a life of eating only boring food. But I really, really, REALLY want to be a size 10 or 12 (dare I even hope for an 8? nah) instead of a 14 or 16, too. I know that one treat a week won't necessarily keep that from happening, especially once I'm in "maintain" mode rather than losing mode. But right now I just feel like I have to keep an iron grip on my discipline or all this progress will just evaporate.



I keep meaning to post about this really cool site I found the other day: FindYourSpot.com. You answer a survey (I am a total sucker for surveys regardless of the content, and this one is really fun and funny) and then, based on your answers, they pull from their database of places the 25 cities/towns that would supposedly be the best fit for you. I got a lot of southern small towns (not a single response was for Kalifornia; I think that had to do with my answer on the "government: less is more?" question). Really, you should try it. Even if you're never going to move away from the place you live, it's still interesting. Realistically, we will probably never live in any of those places, unless we somehow became independently wealthy. It's one of the traps of having a great government job -- it makes it hard to settle for less. Not that T makes oodles of money, but he has job security, benefits, a good retirement program, a job that he likes, and an income that will support a family by itself if we live carefully -- this last in particular is increasingly rare in our daycare-and-public-school-based economy. It's too scary to contemplate moving to a place where he'd have to work in the private sector. ;-). Really, whatever God has in mind would be fantastic. Politically I'd love to live somewhere else. However, having lived in the same rural area since I was born, I am not eager to move away from it, especially since my kids' grandparents are here. Not just for the kids' sake either; I love my parents to pieces and wouldn't enjoy being in a position where I could only see them a few times a year.

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