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Tuesday, September 23, 2003

a long (and often idiotic) survey

do you type really fast? I would say that I type pretty fast, but not really fast.

does it annoy people who are around you (like in the library)? I almost never type around other people.

do you/did you like high school? I liked learning. I liked being with my few friends. The rest of high school pretty much sucked.

how old are you? 28

do you know anyone who has the same birthday as you? if so name them There was a boy in my freshman English class who was born ten minutes before me (except he was actually born 2 hours and 10 minutes before me, because he was born in Colorado). Um, I think there are a few others I know but I'm blanking on them.

favorite pen color I don't care, black or blue is fine.

what word do you constantly misspell when typing? I don't misspell. I do make a lot of typos but generally I correct them.

do you have trees in your yard? Yes, lots.

name one comedian that everyone thinks is funny but you absolutely cannot stand Um, I don't watch comedians. Sorry.

name one director you hate and tell why I am not good at this kind of question. There are movies I like and movies I don't; I don't generally pay attention to who directs them.

do you like tim burton? I am not sure I've ever seen anything he directed.

what annoys you more than anything? a mosquito whining around my ear at night.

tell me about the weirdest pair of socks you own I do not own weird socks.

if you woke up tomorrow morning as the opposite sex, what would you do first? Shave.

did you read fear street books? um, no, these were after my time.

how about sweet valley high? only when forced to.

babysitter's club? the boxcar children? babysitter's club, I read a couple of in junior high. I didn't read any Boxcar Children books until I had children of my own.

goosebumps? Are you kidding? Kids I babysat read Goosebumps books.

favorite show on nickelodeon (can be from the late 80's/early 90's when nick was good) The Donna Reed Show.

did you watch are you afraid of the dark? Ask me if I've heard of this and the answer would be the same: no.

did zeebo the clown scare you? who?

where do you vacation every summer? Morro Bay

do you like the beach? Yes

do you tan or burn easily? I will burn if I'm not careful. Then I tan afterward.

do you make up your own words and lingo? if so tell me about it not really.

do you eat lots of tv dinners? I haven't eaten a TV dinner in about 20 years.

favorite hot pocket flavor Um, I wouldn't know. I think I ate one of these once but I don't know what was in it.

if you could make one celebrity magically disappear, who would it be? Oh, there are many. Too many to list.

how is life treating you? just dandy

do people like you? some do. Most don't, I think.

what do you think it is that makes the "popular" people popular? Believe it or not I have dedicated lots of serious thought to this over the years. To an extent, it's obvious: conformity (even if that means conforming via obvious non-conformity), the right clothes, the right look. But there's something more to it -- something I've never been able to put my finger on. We all know people from our school experience who weren't really ugly, weren't stupid, yet even if you put them in the clothes of the moment and gave them the right haircut and stuff, still, they wouldn't be It. It's really scary that there's an environment to which we are all expected to subject our children (although not all of us do!) where they can be made miserable so easily just because they don't have that magical elusive Something.

what do you wear the most: jeans, cords, dickies, khakis, skirts, or shorts? Um, probably jeans, followed by shorts.

are you using a pc or mac? an antiquated Pleistocene-era PC

do you like chunky peanut butter? Yes. But we don't buy it often because my daughter hates it. It has only recently occurred to me that I could buy both.

what amazes you about the opposite sex? The fact that they can be so hung up on cars. It's a CAR. It's not a friend or a loved one or even anything alive like a horse or a pet. But you would never know it based on typical male behavior. It doesn't bother me, it's just totally foreign to me.

are you in love with anyone? Yep.

do you like anyone? I like lots of people! ;-) (if no other question in this survey did so, that right there proves that this was written by someone born after 1986, no?)

if so, who see above

why do you like them/why are you in love with them? Oh dear. Do you have all day? My husband is my other half, the completion of me. He is the one person I can always trust to be on my side, he knows me inside and out, stands by me no matter what, sees the beauty in me that everyone else misses, and holds my soul in the palms of his hands. Plus, he has really sexy arms. ;-)

favorite cereal Grape-Nuts.

name a movie that makes you cry Lots of movies make me cry. Especially, and this is kind of goofy, movies with scenes where a lot of people are emotional all at once. Like the end of Mr. Holland's Opus or even the end of, God forbid, SpaceCamp. But also tender scenes -- like when Kathleen Kelly is closing her store for the last time and remembering twirling with her mother. That one gets me every time.

what's something you like about the opposite sex, physically, that your friends think is odd? I don't know if my friends think it's odd, but they might. Arms. mmm. wrists.

is it true that only the good die young? This is an idiotic question.

if so, are you going to live forever or die soon? see above.

do you live for today? Not entirely. I enjoy today as much as I can, and get out of it whatever I can (well, except the days when I spend all my time washing dishes, folding laundry, and sitting in front of the computer), but I have to live for the future or when the future came I'd be very sorry I hadn't.

how fast can you run? I used to be able to run faster than average, with decent endurance, but nothing spectacular. I haven't run much in the last ten years. I walk extremely fast, though. I hate getting behind slow people walking, even more than I hate getting behind slow people driving.

favorite band from the 60's/70's Simon and Garfunkel.

have any of your friends had kids as teenagers? not my close friends, but school acquaintances, yes. (heck, my MOM was a teenager when she had my brother. But she was married. She was 19. And I had my first baby at 21.)

did they finish high school? Yep.

favorite 80's television show "Who's The Boss?"

were you even born in the 80's? NO! Crap! I am ancient!

what year? 1974

have you ever taught a little kid a curse word? when I was about 13 I did

if so which one was it? I don't remember

do you think little boys are horrendously ill behaved? Little boys vary, just like all people. There are even, believe it or not, teenage boys who don't wear low-rise ill-fitting pants. I know, I know, but really, it's true.

have you ever thrown anything at a moving car? if so, what? No. But in high school, my best friend, on her last day before moving away, threw a rock at a boy on the bus. She lived with me, and we were of course together at the time, having just gotten off the bus to go home. She was on the ground, he was in the bus, and it was moving away. She broke the back window of the bus, because she failed to account properly for the bus's forward motion when she threw the rock. Oops. The boy really deserved it, too.

name a villian in a movie that scared you when you were a kid it's a TV show, not a movie, but that guy with the mask in that episode of Little House On The Prairie where the girl gets raped -- that totally freaked me out. I had nightmares about that guy for YEARS.

have you seen the original friday the thirteenth? nope. But I did see the first few Nightmare on Elm Street movies.

the original chucky? nope

the original halloween? nope

what's your favorite channel? I do not watch TV. Really. I have a television, but no antenna or cable is attached to it; it is simply a monitor for the DVD player and the VCR. So I am FREE from all this crap, and I do NOT HAVE A FAVORITE CHANNEL. Although sometimes I miss PBS, for the kids' shows.

what do you say when you stub your toe off of the corner of the coffee table? I repeat OW a lot. Sometimes I say "crap".

what's the highest thing you've ever jumped off of and landed unharmed? this is kind of a goofy question. Um, when I was little we used to suspend ourselves from our porch railing (we being my brother and myself) and drop. I'd guess it was about six feet from our feet to the ground.

does it snow where you live? sometimes.

if yes, do you go sled riding? we don't get that much snow. And I don't own a sled.

have you ever used anything weird, like a frisbee or a trashcan lid, for a sled? no, but I've used an old car hood. And of course tractor inner tubes. Who doesn't?

how many people do you know who were born in november? Um, right offhand I can think of three.

what month has the most people you know born in it? Um, maybe September.

do holidays make you festive? To a degree, yes.

magazines you subscribe to None, but my husband buys "Sky and Telescope" every month.

do you read the supermarket tabloids? Since there's usually nothing else for my eyes to rest on in the supermarket line, I read the headlines and laugh.

have you ever smashed somebody's halloween pumpkin? um, no. Again with the weird questions.

ever had yours smashed? Also no.

do you celebrate christmas? Yes.

if not, do you still watch "how the grinch stole christmas" when it comes on television? See above re:television.

do you think the grinch movie starring jim carrey was a waste of money? Probably, but I never saw it.

ever had a hot teacher? I had crushes on a few teachers but I wouldn't say they were "hot".

if yes, did you flirt with him/her? No. I just tried to avoid blushing when they spoke to me, and when I spoke to them.

how do you treat people you are attracted to? (this is not a stupid question; some people are immature and are mean to those they like) I think I was pretty stupid around them, back in the day.

what do you want for your birthday this year? A 100-disc CD changer, a new stereo receiver unit, and Barnes and Noble gift certificates.

have you ever egged somebody's house? Nope

has someone ever egged yours? No, but our car got TP'd and shaving-creamed once.

do we all go a little mad sometimes? Um, probably.

what pisses you off more than anything in the world? Abortion.

do you still go trick or treating? No

do you believe in santa claus? No

have you ever worked in a supermarket? No

how about a restaurant? Yes, several

if yes, do you agree with me when i say that those are the two worst establishments to work in? Actually, I liked working in restaurants. I thought it was fun.

what color is your bedspread? um, blue, with flowers.

do your eyes change colors? nope, but they have freckles.

do you believe that we walked on the moon? yes

do you live by yourself? no

have you ever gotten a computer virus? years and years ago, before Internet, from a floppy disk my brother-in-law used on our computer.

if so, what was it and how did you get rid of it? My brother-in-law fixed it.

describe your junior high/middle school gym teacher Well, I had two different ones in junior high (both men) and two in high school (both women). They were pretty boring as far as description goes. 7th grade: soft kind of nice man I'd known my whole life. 8th grade: this guy looked like the drawings of Neanderthal Man in our school books, but he was really nice; I remember at some school talent show he dressed up as one of the guys in ZZ Top and did a lip-synch thing. High school #1: skinny, not young. She had been my mother's PE teacher as well. Everyone says she's a lesbian but I know her personally and she's not. High school #2: buxom, feminine, ag-oriented. She was nicer to the popular girls than to the unpopular ones, which really bothers me in a teacher, but overall she was a good teacher.

how do you react when someone is talking to you --up in your face-- and they have really bad breath? as subtly as possible.

what was your first date like? Um, my parents took us and dropped us off at the theater in the next town over. We watched "Look Who's Talking". If I remember correctly my best friend was also there. She pretended to time us kissing (my first real kiss). I was in ninth grade.

did you go/are you going to the prom? Yes, I did.

if you've already gone, was it good or bad? explain why It sucked. My date was a dolt.

do you get uneasy when you see a person of a different color than you walking down the same street as you in the middle of the night? I generally do not walk down the street in the middle of the night, and I live in a town that is 99% caucasian, so I don't have this experience. However, when I'm in the city at night, I'm wary of almost everyone, regardless of pigmentation levels.

if yes, do you think that makes you racist? n/a

are you a vegetarian? nope

how about vegan? see above

if no to both, do you think you could be? only if absolutely necessary.

have you ever given up a certain type of food? if so, what was it and why did you do it? For one summer in high school I stopped eating meat, to lose weight, because I always ate too much meat.

spit out a random song lyric for me. make sure you tell me the name of the song and who sings it! I have Simon and Garfunkel on the brain thanks to a question up there, so here goes: "in the halo of a streetlamp, I turned my collar to the cold and damp, when my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light that split the night" -- Sound of Silence

who does the chores around your house? We all have various chores. Mostly the kids and me, since we're the ones home all day.

what movie could you watch a million times and never get tired of? Probably none, really, but Pride and Prejudice is probably the closest to this.

what movie have you watched a million times, and you still laugh at the jokes? do you know that to watch a movie a million times would take 228 years of constant watching for a 2-hour movie? I don't think anyone would be laughing at jokes after 228 years. But that scene in Sleepless in Seattle when the men are making fun of the way the woman talks about a movie -- that one hasn't failed yet...)

what movie do you hope you never see again? there are many, I'm sure, but I can't think of one offhand.

have you ever hugged a stuffed animal or pillow and pretended that it was your significant other, or someone you had a crush on, and then someone caught you talking to it, and stroking its soft, fuzzy fur, and laughed at you and told the whole school? speaking of stupid questions... no.

do you drive? Yes

if so, do you like to drive at night or in the day time? I like driving at night if there's not a lot of oncoming traffic; the headlights bother my eyes after a while.

has anyone ever called you a bitch? Yes, a long time ago.

has anyone ever called you an asshole? Probably

are you a bitch/asshole? No.

what's the first thing you do when you get home from school/work? I don't go to school/work.

favorite pop tart flavor The ONLY pop tarts I like are strawberry ones WITHOUT frosting. That frosting stuff is terrifying.

do you play any musical instruments? Yes, I play the piano and the flute.

have you ever built a snowman? Yes

did you cry when it melted, or when the kid next door knocked its head off with a shovel? "the kid next door" is a pair of ladies who are probably in their late 80's; they don't do a lot of snowman vandalism. And no, I didn't cry when it melted.

what's your religion? Christian

do you try to force it on other people? sigh. It is impossible to force religion on ANYONE, we all have the ability and right to decide things for ourselves. I occasionally tell people what I believe and why. But even if I could, I wouldn't force it on anyone; if it were possible to do so, it would fully negate the value of any beliefs at all.

do you knock on people's doors at 7 a.m. on saturdays, trying to give them a pamphlet and tell them about the lord, or ask random people at the mall if they’ve been saved, yet you think that doesn’t count as forcing religion, you son of a bitch? I do not do these things. People who do are annoying to the general populace. However, they're not forcing. See above.

have you ever been flipping channels late at night and caught a glimpse of some porn on skinemax? see above re:television.

if so, did you watch it? don't say no, i know you did n/a

what's the code word or phrase you and your friends use for the word SEX? um, sex. Sorry to disappoint you, but we're adults.

is sex an uncomfortable topic for you? Not in the right company.

what is the one thing in the world that just looking at it makes you vomit, or come close to it? I can't think of anything genuine offhand. In a previous life I would have put something rude and bitter here. But I'm not like that now. ;)

when other people vomit, does it make you sick? Are you kidding? I'm a mother. I can change puky clothes, wipe puky faces, tables, and chairs, and then resume eating my own meal. Or if T is dealing with the mess, I can eat right through the whole thing.

do your clothes match? generally I try to make sure they don't clash.

what are you wearing right now? a pair of cheezy overall shorts, too short for someone built like me. I'm not going out of the house in this, I just got tired of being in my jammies every day for hours, so I resolved to start getting dressed as soon as I got out of bed. And this was the first thing I pulled out of my drawer this morning.

did you ever have those fisher price roller skates that go over top of your shoes? No, but I had a pair of the roller-rink kind.

did you have a bike with a banana seat? Yes

could you ride it? Yes

have you lived in the same house your entire life? No. have lived in about 15 different houses -- only two (on the same property) since I got married though.

what’s the weirdest thing you’ve lived next to? hmm. I lived next to a wrecking yard once, and I lived in an apartment above the shop at a sand and gravel plant. Most people would probably think that was the weirdest place. Especially since it is next to a man-made pond on a creek about a mile down from the local sewage treatment facility, and your average person from my town has the mistaken idea that that pond has something to do with the sewer. But it doesn't.

who is the ugliest person you’ve ever seen? This is a mean question. I'm not gonna answer it.

do you watch talk shows? see above re:television.

do you think miss cleo is full of shit? who the heck is miss cleo?

if not, have you called her and wasted your money, you idiot? huh?

what are your thoughts on keeping animals in captivity? It's very useful in zoos. Most of us would never see most of those animals live and in person if they weren't in a zoo. And I have no problem with domesticated animals either.

what do you think of all the “superstores” that are popping up everywhere? (super walmart, super k-mart, super target)? They're very convenient. (there are super Targets?). But I've never been in one, unfortunately.

what do you think of pop music? Some of it is OK, especially from the 80's.

tell me something i don’t know In France, they say that ducks say "Couin", and roosters say "Co-co-ri-co!"