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Wednesday, November 05, 2003
starting my diet back at day 1
I haven't gained back the weight I'd lost, but after about a month of eating at a "maintain" level instead of a losing level, today is hell. I'm going back to my strict 1300-1400 calories/day plan, and OUCH, I am starving. It doesn't help that the kitchen is full of candy and chips, from the aforementioned heap-o-treats brought home by T. I keep seeing that box, with the Starbursts and Cheez-its on top, and it's taking every ounce of my willpower to avoid having "just one" -- or "just one at a time," which is more realistic. I am persevering, though. I'm trying to remember how great it felt to lose those 20 pounds, one day at a time, and also how it got to where it felt totally normal to eat more healthily. I have got to get those other 24 pounds off. I hope that by Christmas I'll have a good start on them.
Meanwhile I feel like I'm hollow inside. must not munch. must not munch.
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update:
well, sigh, I sort of caved. C wanted some White Cheddar Cheez-its, and I opened them for her. I looked at the back of the package and saw that the whole package only had 220 calories, so I ate a small handful -- probably not even a fourth of the package. Gotta just move on and put that one behind me... and forget how blissful and salty and crunchy those darn things tasted...
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