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Monday, August 30, 2004

two things

THE DRESS is done. No offense at ALL to the person for whom I made it, but I am inclined to want to give it a vile nickname like Kristin does for the things she sews. It is made out of the most difficult fabric I've ever worked with in my life. Suicidal fabric, that's what it was. All manipulative, sitting there in the machine writing a suicide note about how I didn't take good enough care of it so it just can't go on. But now it's done, and it came out OK, and I am so ready to make something out of flannel. Flannel is the nice grandmother of fabrics: "Whatever you say is fine with me, dearie." But yay. It's done: dress, crinoline, ruffle, little bolero jacket... even a little purse. yay.


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WHY CATS ARE GOOD TO HAVE AROUND


1. If you have too many dishes they'll gladly break some for you. It's no problem for them at all; one leap onto the counter, an easy grab at a mixing bowl holding a large stack of cereal bowls, and it's all taken care of.

2. If you have too much money, you can always spend it on cat litter, cat food, a schmanzy litter pan with a sifter, long-term feeders, new dishes, etc.

3.If you don't have enough laundry to do, they'll gladly pee in every. single. basket. of clean laundry you ever turn your back on, plus your kids' tub of dress-up clothes, so that you can rewash everything twice or three times (heaven forbid you should just fold it and put it away as soon as it's dry. Where's the fun in that?)

4. If you haven't explained sex to your five-year-old yet, they'll give you a great reason to do so. Actually, my kids still think that the reason the cats can't go outside is because they'll meet men cats, get married, and have babies (they probably even picture them wearing wedding dresses. Or considering Mommy's recent sewing project, silver lamé). And the reason they go around scraping their tummies on the ground with their butts up in the air for a few days twice a month is because they want to get married. Cripes, we have got to get those beasts spayed, before we catch them going through Bride's magazine.

5. Who wants a clean bathroom? Just put the litter pan and the food and water dishes in there and voilà! You'll never have to deal with that irritating no-litter-on-the-bathroom-floor feeling again.



I hate when my husband is right about stuff.

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